Friday, February 10, 2012

Mst3k – 306: Daddy-O

                A solid, enjoyable episode. Daddy-O is one of those fifties teenager/crime flicks filled with rock-and-roll, drag racing, and kids who are smarter than local authorities (at least in theory). The film follows Dick Contino as a young trucker/drag-racer named Phil who is drawn into a web of crime and corruption when his best friends gets bumped off by a crime boss (played by Bruno VeSota). oAssisting/sparring with him is a chestacular platinum blond named Jan, who also likes to drag race and has a serious attitude problem. They fight, flirt, fall in love, and eventually get VeSota arrested after some lame yet-strangely-catchy songs and truly horrendous editing. The film is more lame than awful, and at least it moves quickly and makes some attempt to hold our interest. VeSoto in particular has fun in the ‘pseudo intellectual crook’ persona: he was a genuinely talented actor, basically a poor-man’s Sydney Greenstreet, and always a welcome addition.
                Interestingly enough, the music in this film was provided by a young John Williams. Yes, that John Williams, apparently before he really hit his stride. Like I say, the music is oddly catchy, but it certainly doesn’t give any hint that the man composing it would go on to create some of the greatest film scores of all time.
                Riffwise, this is a pretty fun episode: fast-paced and witty. The Brains seem to be enjoying the good-natured cheesiness of the movie and numerous gags are had at the expense of Dick’s wardrobe, the terrible editing, and the lame dialogue.
                The film is proceeded by a short called “Alphabet Antics:” an educational film for preschoolers. Amusingly, the writers were clearly either trying too hard or not hard enough to be original, resulting in some truly bizarre associations, the best being “O is for Once” followed by a brief story of an ox failing to pull a plow (why couldn’t they just say “O is for Ox”?). Mostly they involve animals being put through semi-abusive situations, prompting some very funny riffs.
                Host-segment wise, there’s some good fun to be had spoofing the movie, especially Joel’s version of one of Dick’s songs and Crow and Servo reenacting the drag race by running Joel over repeatedly. The episode ends on a high note with the ‘broken button sketch:’ the ‘button’ on the Mads’ control panel is broken, so the credits start and stop repeatedly while Dr. F. tries to make Frank hold the button down.  It’s a great example of the kind of independent, creative thought these guys had: who would even come up with the idea to do something like that?
                So, cheesy movie, good riffing, great short, mostly good host segments make for a solidly fun episode.

Opening: Hanging around the water-cooler: Servo falls for Gypsy, then Magic Voice. It’s really amusing in a bizarre ad-libbed kind of way.

Invention: The Mads still have the giant baby from last time. Joel has an air-freshener mobile; the Mads have the alien-teething-nook: basically a pacifier in the shape of a facehugger. They’re both very amusing, particularly the bots’ uncertain silence after Joel rattles off numerous baby-talk words for ‘poop.’ “What the Hell is ‘checher?’”

The Sort: Alphabet Antics

Servo: “I never had any toys as a child!”

Servo:  “Yes, the modern aircraft! Unsurpassed in its services to livestock!”

Servo: “D is for Damned, as in “Village of.”

Joel (on “E is for Elephant”): “Hey, it’s the Republican National Convention.”

(on a very crowded playground)
Crow: “It’s a child farm!”

Narrator: “They say the Dutch make cheese that is good and it’s true.”
Servo: “It’ll plug you up for an hour or two.”

Crow: “Look out! There’s a huge, shapely woman lounging next to the boat!”

“I is for In.” Seriously, that was the best they could come up with?

Narrator: “B is for the bump you get when you fall.”
Joel: “And you break your back, neck, pelvis and all!”

Servo: “N is for float…huh?”
(it’s supposed to be ‘Nursery Rhyme.’ Again was that the best they could do?)

Narrator: “O is for Once.”
Servo: “O is for Once? What, was there a writer’s strike?”

Joel: “P is for PETA who’s boycotting this.”

Q is for the queer, queer pelican. Seriously, who came up with these?

Narrator: “You may think he’s queer, it’s true/he probably thinks the same about you.”
Servo: “Yeah, but he’s got a brain like a chickpea.”

Servo: “T is for tormented, tortured, and teased!”

The narrator spends a surprising about of time on ‘walking.’

X is for X-mas. Well, it’s better that “O is for once” thing.

Crow: “I hope we’ve touched you with a little bit of our evilness.

And now the movie.

You know you’re a special kind of movie fan to be excited to see that Bruno VeSoto is in this movie.

Crow (on the opening close-up on a rolling car tire): “I bet Firestone tires financed this.”

And John Williams did the music!
Crow: “Before he heard Stravinsky.”

We open on our hero (Dick Contino) driving a truck and nearly being run off the road by a crazy woman driver.

Servo: “I think this is Duel 2: the Trucker’s Story.”

The cars end up on a construction site, and the workers immediately side with the hot-blond lady of course.

And we cut to a night-club.

Servo: “Today’s youth! Hopped up on crack, crystal meth, formaldehyde process opium, tar heroin, and pomade!”

Hero sits down at a table with some friends.

One of his friends is obviously preoccupied.

Hot blonde walks in (her name is Jan).

Hero’s name is Phil.

Jan: “You’re singing can be any worse than your driving, Daddy-O.”
Servo: “You haven’t heard my singing.”

Joel notes that he’s not that bad.

Crow: “He’s singing the left side of the menu!”

Servo: “Boy, not a necktie to be seen, where’s our country going?”

In a hilarious moment, his voice inexplicably cuts out and is replaced by screams.
Joel: “Ah, he’s got a gun!”

Crow: “Now he’s singing about the continental breakfast.”

All (singing along): “Please, please, please end the song now!”

First Host Segment: Joel sings “Hike Your Pants Up High!” “It ain’t hip ‘til you’re in total pain.” It’s a pretty funny little number, and the bots have some pretty hilarious little band costumes.

Back in the movie, Jan and Phil are arguing, then start dancing roughly and arguing more.

Servo: “Okay, now whose breasts are bigger here?”

The upshot is that Jan challenges Phil to a drag-race.

Phil: “Let’s make it.”
Joel: “You mean they have to build their cars like a soap-box derby…?”

Pre-occupied Friend: “Phil…”
Servo: “We’re all gonna die alone and afraid.”

Pre-occupied Friend (POF) runs out pursued by Bruno VeSoto.

Crow (as VeSoto): “It doesn’t matter how slow I go, I’ll catch him, my son’s the editor.”

Very confusing editing and POF’s car rolls and burns over a cliff (I think).

Cut to the beginning of the race.

Guy: “You know your way through, Janet?”
Jan: “Blindfolded!”
Servo: “So be it!”

Very slow, awkward race ensues.

Jan wins.

Following conversation is very awkwardly edited.

Joel: “Cops was filmed on location twenty years ago.”

Anyway, Phil  gets arrested, booked for the manslaughter of POF.

He gets off on the manslaughter, but is put on probation and loses his license.

Lawyer: “I’d call you pretty lucky.”
Phil: “Lucky!”
Crow: “Look at the shirt! You call this lucky?”

Lawyer: “If you can’t find anything by next week, I’ll give you a hand.”
Servo: “Not a job, just a hand. I have your friend’s hand in the drawer!”

Phil starts suspecting Jan of killing POF.

His friend takes him to Jan’s house to investigate (then drives off and leaves him!).

Odd little bit where she offers him an apple and he knocks it aside.

(he gets a little rough with her)
Joel: “My head’s not an apple!”

She points out the damage on her car was on the wrong side, they join forces.

Phil: “Jan, I think we’re onto something.”
Crow: “Well, would you let us in on it?”

Cut to a “Gym”
Joel: “Bruce’s Gym and Church

Ugly big guy blocks Phil’s entrance to the gym, leads to some odd little lines.

Second Host Segment: The bots re-enact the drag race and repeatedly run over Joel.

Return to Phil and Jan sneaking into the gym.

Jan: “You leave me here and I won’t be here when you get back.”
Crow: “Hey, remember what he did to the apple!”

Joel: “Got to think…must try to think but too stupid…”

Joel: “Bruce’s gym, now with three full pieces of equipment.”

VeSoto and ugly guy come in, take stuff out of POF’s locker, nearly discover heroes, and leaves.

Cut back the night club, VeSoto approaches Phil about a job.

And then Phil is picked up by VeSoto’s manicurist.

Servo: “Wanted: Manicurist for an evil Slav. Photo, a must!”

(They walk under a ladder)
Crow: “Now, I know this is bad luck, but you’re already in the movie.”

Bruno VeSoto should never be filmed in a toga.

VeSoto: “I put a lot of thought into making this a place for young people to come for some wholesome fun…and music.”
Joel: “And evil.”

Crow: “Have you ever thought about being evil? Really evil?”

VeSoto offers Phil a fake license for his services as a driver/singer. Phil accepts.

Cut to Jan trying to have a conversation with Phil while she’s in her car, he’s walking.

She then barges in to his apartment to talk.

They start making out…

Cut to the grand opening of the club.

(on Phil’s singing)
Servo: “This goes out to the two of you in the audience.”

And Jan gets a job there too (and Phil stupidly tries to get her to leave right in front of VeSoto).

Phil grabs a drink:
Crow: “No, that’s the candle!”

Another song…

He sings it to masseur then kisses her.

Cut to VeSoto talking to him.

VeSoto: “I have some good news for you…”
Joel: “John 3:16.”

So VeSoto gives him a currier job.

Third host segment: Joel demonstrates different spit-takes. They’re then visited by the ugly guy from the movie (played by Mike Nelson). It’s kind of a random sketch: like they came up with two ideas but didn’t know which to do, so they combined them.

Back to the movie, another currier job.

Joel: “Yesterday pizza, today butter, tomorrow the world!”

And Phil gets caught by the cops.

Crow: “Daddy-O is soon gonna be deady-o.”

Cut to drug-dealer talking about how they need to deal with Phi (the scene ends mid-word).

Phil is accosted by some thugs.
Crow: “We’re gonna kill you, but we need to stop at a cash machine first. “

Thugs beat him up.

They dump him and Jan picks him up.

Somehow Phil deduces who killed POF.

Phil: “It just hurts a little when I breathe.”
Crow: “Then don’t breathe.”

The plan he recites doesn’t really make much sense.

They tail VeSoto to where he’s picking up some dope.

Servo: “In the fourth quatrain, Nostradamus predicted the end of this movie will result in bloodshed, the destruction of England, and cigar smoke.”

And Ugly Guy catches Phil and Jan, VeSoto ropes them into helping him.

Phil overpowers Ugly Guy by taking his glasses off.

So, VeSoto throws Jan in the steam-bath and turns it up all the way.

Phil shows up, awkward chase scene ensues in the basement.

And ugly guy somehow gets back, takes Jan out of the steam-bath…

Back to the basement for some of the worst editing you’ll ever see.

Then Ugly Guy and Jan run into some police and they just stop.

Servo: “And that was the incredible action sequence of Daddy-O.”

And the police pretty much just laugh off his recent spat of law-breaking.

Phil: “I’ve never felt more like singing in my life.”
Crow: “And we’ve never felt less like hearing you!”

Final Host Segment: Joel practices reenacting the film, then they read letters. The baby then plays with the buttons, resulting in them breaking. The result is the credits starting and stopping numerous times. It’s a hilariously creative bit. Honestly, how many shows would even consider something like this?

 Stinger: “Couldn’t help you if I wanted to, pal. Gym policy.” A solid choice, though I think “Want some?” is more iconic to the movie.

Movie Quality Rating:
1.       Godzilla vs. the Sea Monster
2.       The Crawling Eye
3.       The Black Scorpion
4.       Gamera vs. Barugon
5.       Mad Monster
6.        Lost Continent
7.       Gamera
8.       First Spaceship to Venus
9.       Stranded in Space
10.   Rocketship XM
11.    Moon Zero Two
12.   Godzilla vs. Megalon
13.   The Crawling Hand
14.   Catalina Caper
15.   Daddy-O
16.   King Dinosaur
17.   Jungle Goddess
18.   Wild Rebels
19.   The Corpse Vanishes
20.   Ring of Terror
21.   Untamed Youth
22.   The Slime People
23.   Project Moonbase
24.   The Sidehackers
25.   Women of the Prehistoric Planet
26.   Robot vs. The Aztec Mummy
27.   Cave Dwellers
28.   Tim of the Apes
29.   Pod People
30.   Hellcats
31.   Rocket Attack USA
32.   Robot Holocaust
33.   Robot Monster

Conclusion: Lame-not-awful movie with some very bad editing and dialogue, but accompanied by some great riffs, host segments, and a hilarious short makes for a solid episode.

Final Rating: 8/10.

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