Here is my embarkation on the most ambitious blog project I have: a full run-down and review of Mystery Science Theater 3000 (MST3K) from ‘The Crawling Eye’ to ‘Danger: Diabolik.’ My plan is to review one episode a week until the series is completed (it's unlikely to work that way, considering episode availability and personal obligations).
First off, a note for those who are unfamiliar with the show; Mystery Science Theater 3000 ran from 1988-1999 (including a little-remember ‘practice run’ on the channel KTMA). It revolved around a guy (first Joel, later Mike) and two robots being forced to watch bad movies. The plot, such as it is, is that a mad scientist named Dr. Clayton Forrester (Dr. F.) has concocted a plan to rule the world by finding the worst movie ever made; a movie so bad that it will mentally destroy anyone who watches it. To find this movie, he has shot his janitor, Joel Robinson, into space on the bone-shaped Satellite of Love. Once there, Dr. F forces Joel to watch movie after movie hoping to find one that will crush his soul. Joel fights back in two ways; to keep himself company, he makes four robots; Crow T. Robot, Tom Servo, Gypsy, and Cambot. Then, when forced to watch the movies, he, Crow, and Tom fight back by making fun of them. It’s their quips and ‘riffs’ that provide most of the show’s humor as we watch the movie with them and laugh at their jokes. Most of the show takes place in the theater, with Joel and the ‘bots in silhouette in a corner while the movie itself plays on the big screen.
When they leave the theater, they present little ‘host segments;’ short skits mostly having something to do with the movie they’re watching, but not always.
Now, I believe we have enough information to proceed. ‘The Crawling Eye’ was the first episode produced for the ‘Comedy Channel,’ which would later merge and morph and eventually end up as part of Comedy Central. So, here, for all intents and purposes, is the very first MST3K episode.
This isn’t a pilot or an origin story; there is no such thing for MST3K. The show’s plot only is an excuse for the theater segments. A real origin story would only waste time (that being said, I do personally rather long to see how this story began and how Joel wound up on the Satellite and made the bots. That puts me in the minority, however).
We get all the back-story we’re going to get in the opening segment, where Dr. F and his first assistant, Dr. Earhart (soon to be replaced by TV’s Frank; more on him when he shows up) explain that they’ve moved down to Deep 13 (where they would remain until the end of Season 7), a subbasement of ‘Gizmonic Institute’ (where Joel used to work). For me this tiny bit of actual plot is a nice treat. Like I said, I understand why they didn’t do more, but it’s still a little personally disappointing.
In the beginning of the episode is an ‘invention exchange,’ where Joel and the Mads would create competing contraptions of a usually wacky and almost-cartoonish nature. These were generally a lot of fun, though I personally tend to find them amusing more than laugh-out-loud funny. This first one is a good example; Joel has invented an electric bag-pipe (a leaf-blower hooked up to a primitive bag-pipe) and the Mads have invented a canine antiperspirant (which briefly gives Dr. Earhart the mind of a dog). This done, we move on to this week’s experiment.
The movie in this case, ‘The Crawling Eye,’ is really not that bad by MST3K standards; it’s rather slow and the sound is bad, but it has the fun quality of many sci-fi pictures from this period, and the monsters are pretty nicely done. The acting is professional enough; neither grate nor noticeably bad, and it has some rather interesting ideas (the cloud of cold, which conveniently conceals the monsters until the end, for one).
Nevertheless, it provides some good MST3K fodder. Or, would if it was shown a few years later. In its early days the riffing on MST3K was much more sparse than it would later become, leading to long sections of the film with no riffs. This, incidentally, means it’s a good thing they picked a comparatively good movie to riff this time, as the film manages to hold our interests even when Joel and the Bots are silent.
That being said, the riffs here are generally pretty good; the show certainly started off on a good note with this one. The numerous eye puns at the end were more amusing than funny, but several rather dark jokes earlier on made me laugh (my favorite bit being the ‘these four brave men’ bit). The jokes of the fat climber who hogs the bed are good too, as are some of the jokes regarding the possessed guy. And the ‘You looked in my BAG!’ line made me laugh out loud (and incidentally would make a great tee-shirt).
Since the jokes are so sparse, there isn’t a lot to discuss with the film segments. The host segments, meanwhile, mostly revolve around discussion humor, like most of the host segments of the time; the bots ask Joel about something and they continue through their odd questions and comments. I must admit, I don’t find these particularly funny, but others might get more out of them. The show was clearly still evolving at the time and the elaborate skits of later seasons are still far off.
My favorite host segment is the second one, which focuses on the third ‘Bot, Gypsy. For a long time the show’s only female character, Gypsy is easily the character who develops the most over the course of the show. In the beginning she is, as head writer Michael J. Nelson commented in the Episode Guide, a ‘dim-witted, cow-like creature played by a man.’ This show has her at her dimmest and most cow-like. She seems barely functional and you can hardly understand what she’s saying. Also, at one point Joel takes off her eye (all the bots are made of found materials, Gypsy’s single eye is literally a big flashlight), which seems to disturb her greatly. Still, the host segment is pretty funny, I particularly like Servo’s comment ‘I scratch her hear and it takes her six hours to feel it in her head.’
A word about Servo; Josh Weinstein (Dr. Earhart) voices him for the first season and then leaves. For the rest of the show’s run, Servo was voiced by Kevin Murphy. As I am far more familiar with the later episodes (as are most people), it is a bit jarring to hear Josh’s bored, been-there-done-that voice coming out of Servo’s mouth. Also, in the host segments Servo is completely immobile; he looks like a statue! Later, Kevin Murphy would make Servo into a dynamic, mobile character, but that’s for the future.
Now onto Crow. Trace Bealieu, who also played Dr. F. would be Crow until Season 8. To this day he is the definitive Crow for most every fan. Crow, in contrast with Servo, already demonstrates Bealieu’s tremendous puppetry talent, with his subtle little looks and facial expressions. His voice is far more babyish than it would later become, but Crow is far more developed at this point than Tom or (especially) Gypsy.
As for Cambot, he is simply the camera and rarely directly interacts with the other characters.
In the end, this is a decent enough episode, even for those weaned on the faster paced later ones. It served as a good first episode and a sign of better things to come.
Final Rating: 7/10.
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